Hey yall!
For anyone who has ever written a paper, we all know that similes "provide a picture for the mind" or "describe what you are trying to say" and all that junk. Some people really possess the skill. I don't know if anybody has heard of this man, but he is great at similes. He is this guy named Shakespeare. "Death lies on her like an untimely frost," he uses in his story "Romeo and Juliet". Who else could come up with something so thought-provoking and beautiful? It makes me want to shed a tear like a cloud full of rain. Well, I might not have the skill, but this other guy named Charles Dickens came up with one that us humans use a lot. "As good as gold," he says in his story "The Christmas Carol". Yeah, yeah, it's a metaphor, but you get my point. It describes what he is saying perfectly. His words are smooth like Asian silk. Well, that wasn't a good one either... Here, let's make me feel better. Here are some other not-so-good ones that people have used in their high school essays...
*The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
*Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
*Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
*Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center.
*He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
*John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
*The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
*The door had been forced, as forced as the dialogue during the interview portion of "Jeopardy!"
*The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
*She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
*The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
*It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
*She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
*It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
And just so yall know, I didn't write these.
Hope yall enjoyed!
-favs
http://www.bukisa.com/articles/45485_famous-simile-poems (I googled "Famous Similes" and this was one of the first websites that came up.)
http://mistupid.com/people/page027.htm (same as above.)
2 comments:
I wish I could make similes that were that funny. My favorite one was the one about dads chasing their kids with power tools. Those were really clever. Keep up the good work!
Thanks Phillip! I thought that they were pretty funny too. I would never use them in a paper, though!
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